


Saturn

by TsingaDark



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-27 21:44:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6301540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TsingaDark/pseuds/TsingaDark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo felt a void inside of himself, like a black hole that sucked everything inside and simply left behind something dark and unknown.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Saturn

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Broken Heart](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/183199) by TsingaDark. 



> this is just a really short story in which i worked through my feelings about the ending of the hobbit.  
> I wrote this while listening to Saturn by Sleeping At Last (i highly recommend listening to that song while reading the story; also, the entire album is amazing).  
> fyi, I originally named this "Broken Heart" but I don't really think that title fits the story so I gave it a different one here. the name of the song doesn't describe what the story is about but i still think it fits ten times better than the original title.

Bilbo felt a void inside of himself, like a black hole that sucked everything inside and simply left behind something dark and unknown. The tears had cleared his cheeks from blood and dirt and had left his eyes red and swollen. They had stopped a long time ago. By now Bilbo couldn’t cry anymore. He didn’t feel anything. He thought that his heart was the part where the emptiness was the worst. It actually wasn’t possible that he was still alive, as detached from his feelings as he was, but the universe didn’t care about these things and left him behind in this empty shell that would join the others in a few hours but wouldn’t _feel_ anything.

How would he ever be able to feel again after the person that had become so important to him in the last few weeks, the person for whom he had put his life on the line, had been ripped so brutally from his life? Bilbo had almost come to terms with the fact that he could be hurt during the battle. He had anticipated it despite of his militancy.

But never, _never_ , had he thought something could happen to Thorin, who was an experienced fighter and wouldn’t let the Durin’s curse get himself down. Of course he had expected a few minor wounds. And for some time the battle had seemed bloody hopeless. But after Bilbo had regained consciousness and had spotted the eagles, he thought that they had finally made it. That the worst was over. He had never been more wrong. The worst thing, that Bilbo couldn’t have made up even in his darkest dreams, had occurred. The battle had been won yet Thorin had fallen.

Even now Thorin’s last words repeated themselves over and over in Bilbo’s head. How Thorin had smiled at him, like he could let go now that he knew that Bilbo was okay and that he forgave him. However, he hadn’t considered that Bilbo would never be okay again. Not now that Thorin was gone from his life. Bilbo had thought that maybe they could have a future. Together. And even if Thorin hadn’t wanted Bilbo the way he wanted him, he still would’ve been _alive_.

Bilbo’s hand trembled as he swept his hand across his cheek to brush off non-existent tears. Thorin’s blood was still on it and he couldn’t help but stare at it. He would never be the same.


End file.
